Six golden relationship rules to guide the transformation
by Mark Hordes, Partner, Alexander Consulting, LLP

Any person whose thoughts and actions are grounded in the principles of client respect and mutual collaboration is a trusted advisor. To the trusted advisor, the relationship experience is paramount and is based on caring about the client’s long-term business interests.

How can you make the transition to trusted advisor in all your interactions with clients? For any company staffed with technical specialists (service professionals, consultants, engineers and other technical experts), follow six relationship rules to make this transition work.



Golden rule #1: Transparency

Have you ever been in a conversation with someone and you just sensed that he or she was not telling you the truth? We all have. In business situations, when you wish to develop a trust-based relationship with a client, never lie, stretch the truth or state facts and circumstances you cannot substantiate. The way to develop transparency is through honest dialogue and being open at all times with people. Start every conversation with the philosophy that honesty is the best policy, and observe how positively the other person responds. Being open and honest is highly contagious! Here are examples:

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"I’ve been thinking about what you said you need, but a less costly model might work best for your company at this time."

"This is really a very difficult assignment we have been working on; may I share with you what has been challenging?"

Golden rule #2: Commonality

Sharing business or personal interests, experiences or views of the world is the fuel that starts a positive discussion. In business, people like to work with individuals they like and feel they have something in common with.

Discuss hobbies, children, sports interests, educational endeavors or world events to create the type of interaction that brings you closer together and fosters a common bond. Everyone can find something in common to talk to others about because we have all lived interesting lives. Look for ways to share commonality; because the more similarities we share with someone, the easier it is for us to trust him or her.

As soon as you seek commonality you become more engaging. Your words and body language communicate interest and curiosity:

"Nice to see you."

"I really enjoy fly fishing, too. Want to see a picture of the monster trout I just caught in Oregon?"

"How can I be of help?"

Golden rule #3: Respect

When you understand and value the uniqueness of another individual with different opinions and ideas than you, you share one of the highest orders of respect with that person. In a business environment, especially when you are communicating with clients, it’s critical to see the other person as an individual worthy of your neutral and objective point of view.

You can probably recall many times when you strongly disagreed with a client’s view of the world on a certain issue. In those circumstances, a respectful way to respond is saying, "That’s an interesting point of view, say more about that."

Even though you have definite points of views on many topics, born out of a lifetime of experiences and relationships, always remember to value the uniqueness of the individual who is sitting across from you, and always remember to give him or her the respect that person deserves.

Golden rule #4: Caring

Have the client’s best interests at heart, and demonstrate the purposeful act of caring by communicating a willingness to learn about what success means to the other person, on both a professional and personal level. You can also demonstrate caring through non-verbal behavior: how you listen, use your facial expressions, nod your head, lean forward to show interest and look directly at the other person. Caring is a rich emotional presence that when combined with respect, commonality and transparency adds an emotional context to the trust-building process. For example:

"Our security group has recently completed several projects for a large company, and it was able to eliminate several serious roadblocks that stopped fraud cold! I would be pleased to have our lead consultant come in and share the case study with you. Would that be helpful to you?"

Golden rule #5: Credibility

Demonstrate credibility by competence, fairness and integrity. Trusted advisors always follow a set of internal integrity beliefs that guide behavior. They also demonstrate credibility by sharing lessons learned and best practices gleaned from other engagements, and relating skills and experiences to the situation in front of them.

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"This project feels just like the one we did at TechnoTech, can I share with you a few lessons we learned and best practices we discovered?"

Trusted advisors speak freely, and are not afraid of giving important information that will benefit the client’s decision-making process and thinking. Always try to be fair: fair in your negotiations, level setting, mutual expectations, as well as basing fees on value-creating actions and activities.

Golden rule #6: Reliability

Consistently do what you say you will do to promote reliability. Never make promises you have no intention of keeping. Always follow up, and communicate regularly. Trusted advisors build a track record of coming through for someone. We all know that actions speak louder than words. When you are seen as a reliable person, people trust you to do the right thing.

An old Chinese saying goes something like this, "May you live in interesting times." It would be an understatement to say that the world is getting more complicated, technology driven and impersonal. By developing skills, behaviors and actions, akin to being a trusted advisor, the world gets more personal and real, and less complicated. Follow these six rules to build trusted advisors in your organization, and you will soon capture "the best of times" with all your client and customer relationships.

Mark Hordes is an internationally recognized speaker, business author, consultant and a partner with Alexander Consulting, LLP, a management consultancy that helps product companies create and implement professional services strategies. Hordes is also co-author with Jim Alexander of the best-selling services book, S-Business: Reinventing the Services Organization. Contact Mark at mark@alexanderconsultingsbiz.com, 713-781-0251 or visit www.alexanderconsultingsbiz.com.